Imposter Syndrome
I get feelings of ‘Imposter Syndrome‘ when doing programming. I feel I am never good enough.
The amount of ‘this anxiety’ depends on what I am doing.
- When I am creating things that I want the anxiety is OK. It is thrilling and fun type of anxiety. Is it really healthy?
- When I am working together with my friends the anxiety is alright. This type is a bit stressful and wearing. Sometimes I sit on the idea/project for a long time until I get the nerve and understanding of its importance.
- When I am doing school work I just get stressed and am out of my comfort zone. It is competitive and not fun. It is work and I must lose myself in the work to get in the zone and try to make it adventurous, fun learning, discovering and creating. Completely zone out into another world.
I have no experience working and teaching in the field professional so that maybe the big reason why I suffer anxiety and stress. I am really out of my comfort zone. But I think it is healthy at my age to do more and not get caught up in minor superficial things. I am not young no more and don’t want to go back to the past.
Anyways I am trying to look for work tutoring maybe while I am still in school.
With COVID surging again (Today is Jan 16, 2023), I am not sure what to do. Might as well tutor online.
But maybe that is life? Don’t we all suffer from the unknown a bit as we get older and are free on our own? More or less. I guess we have to find others to confide with or post about it.
Sometimes I am just sure about everything but with programming I am always unsure? My previous life was not questionable. I always had an answer.
UPDATE
I was talking to my brother-in-law, and he says most people in IT suffer from Imposter Syndrome.
Everyday working in IT is a challenge and sometimes or regularly question being there doing IT.
Is that I life I want?
It seems interesting and healthy to do that.
Healthy that you continue to push and push to answer the solutions.
I think it is always healthy to do this.
I should do this.