Family

Father side:

On my dad side, my father is the second born and first male.

The rest of the cousins on this side looked at me weirdly why I did not achieve success in the West when I visited them in 2006 and 2015.

I talked about the culture here in Canada. They did not understand. They expected I should have figured a way to work and live and have a family in the West and achieve milestones like other Vietnamese in California.

Mother side:

On my mom side, my mother is the fourth born and first female.

Most of the cousins when I went back in 2002 had jobs and degrees already. They pushed me to follow my dreams.

When I went to back to Vietnam in 2015, my older cousins were startled why I could not make it in the West. They were all suffering in Vietnam as globalization was on full speed making it impossible to afford land. My cousins on my mother’s side had to build houses on their grandfather’s lot. They could not afford to buy land for themselves. The living conditions and wages were too low to afford anything. Only the past generational wealth allows movement.

I looked deep into my oldest cousins eyes of uncle #4 and saw that he did not understand and see what I was at the time in 2015. All I could see is disappointment and loss of opportunity of living in the West.

I thought they could understand how I was affected by the culture in Canada. But no. they expected me to have doctorate degrees like they heard and seen from Vietnamese living in California, USA.

I was upset going back to Vietnam because the living conditions were so low at the time. I took it upon myself to work hardest in the back of my mind because my cousins on my mother side just expected education and academic excellence.

At the time in 2006 and 2015, I thought I was different from the Vietnamese in California and could not do anything. But in 2025 now, I realize it was just following your intuition and working with the greats.