Updates (December 27, 2024)

Socializing and now living.

• The Western way of life puts education and work and experience at the forefront. I always knew I had to do education. I had to do education even if I did not want to. It gets to that point.
• I did not know the entire world would change to this though … The world is chasing more education and work. There are only a few jobs that don’t have this pressure.
• I knew that people who thought like me would get me and understand me. That is to study and study and work somewhat but also think more to have that uniqueness and personal abundant space. That information and education was taught on TV here in Canada/West. So far only a few people understand me and they are born or raised mostly in the West. The ones that understand me don’t pressure me or ask me for anything. It is because the variety of thinking and lifestyles allowed in the West allowed me to pursue my unique life here in Canada. People born here in the West understands and allows me to live my way.
• I can ignore most people now. I grew and cemented my own way of life here in the West now. I talked to Vietnamese born in the West and we finally see eye-to-eye. We have something and are developing something here with the support of the West.

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Things I realize more now:

• Working social jobs including health care jobs is great and all. But what hangs over that is Maths I think. It seems the more Maths you learn and the more you put yourself out there doing your own thing and research, it becomes bigger and over everyday things including health. Including your health. You are actively and obsessively doing unique things that drive you to the horizons. That is what happens after you personally have done your thing. You are now satiated and now you are just walking around absorbing life. Now life becomes working on work/your dreams and your friends. Just those two.

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More Asian stories …

• There is really only one face you should concentrate on if you are Asian maybe … In Asian culture, being smart and educated is really life. In the Western world, you can dive into arts and living the Western way. But to achieve both is to do both. I tried living the Western way and I got sick but learned from it and got Westernized. I tried living the general Asian way and it was just OK. But when I learned about Vietnamese culture from lots of angles then I found my drive. I could finally think and do my way from my core. But the reality for a good life here in Canada/West is to do the old fashion way from the early times I think. That is to study with your group and do educated things. I saw the old caricature of Asian people studying hard and well and achieving success in schools and business. But I guess they went ahead and tried the Western way and it did not 100% reflect them. They tried everything and finally learned it all and then focused on the maths and sciences to be proud regardless of monetary compensation. The accolades of achieving education and doing research is enough. They tried everything when they were young I guess and when they went to university they could do it and handle it. That is the trick. Trying out everything Western and things in between then using what you learned to achieve things your way, your story.
  • After all the interactions I have had in my life so far in my 40 years, the most safest, easiest, viable most respectable way to live is like the old stereotype (1970s/80s/90s) of Asians in the West. A nerdy Asian father who lives in the suburbs with his Asian wife and kids who does some type of office work (accountant/technical/engineering) from home or travels to the those tech companies on the outskirts of the city by 4-door reliable sedan. It requires lots of exploration and experience to do this really. You crave more and a Western life but at the end of the day, this geeky life is pretty sweet when you can do a lot with maths. People can not explain it or tell you this. You got to experience this yourself. However long it takes. I really believe the old or middle-age Asian geek engineer is having a swell time. Not many people say it is worthwhile because they are afraid you will be in their position and then they have to share. When you have the knowledge and power and control, you don’t want to share with others … Pretty unfortunate.
• In the summer of this year, I went to an Asian grocery store in the Scarborough North area (Steeles Ave) with my mom and brother, I looked pretty old and disheveled a bit but generally healthy and well. The Asian customers and Asian workers looked at me surprised to see a Vietnamese man in his 40s confident and healthy. The stereotype of Vietnamese is not good generally. They sought to know what was going on … I projected out, “Just study and study and study until you finally get there and can do something”. That was it. That was life. As another Asian, that is all you can do in the West. Everyone already knew that … I was just another example of making it to the other side. Because I was old there was no squabbles. I was making the best of life here in the West as an Asian person like many others … Takes a lot of trial and error and experiences to see this through if you are born here. Lots of wasting time and exploring this and that until you are just a old Asian person who can think pretty big and hopefully creative.