Updates (August 6, 2024)

I always forget like I am one of the oldest Vietnamese born in the West winging it after the Vietnam War. I have a few friends helping me out which I am grateful for.

I think you really have to detach from your body at this point in life. Like really focus on you mind now because that helps everything else and goes the extra 3-4 levels.

Things to focus on:

• Focus on learning
• Doing things you like to get those degrees. Get those degrees and experiences to teach one day if need be. You have to be proactive a little more to avoid relying on teachers to teach you. Just write your exams to get the paper. Real life outside teaches you everything and not in schools really.
• Avoid people who don’t understand you and your purpose. You are dealing with the harshest realities so mostly keep that in mind. Don’t bother with people who are not in your shoes because you have to help yourself first and there are limits to how understanding and helpful your are. Don’t care about culture, race and politics. Think higher than that.
• You really got to detach from your body at middle age and go deep into thinking and learning and inventing/developing and being creative. Being creative and developing are the only things that give you that happy “zing”. It makes you rise above normal thinking and get to the highest level of thinking and being.

To summarize life at this point at year 40. After done school and working. This is what life is:

“I am old middle-age decaying man. I have to use my brain and do good things and develop. There is nothing else in the world to do.”

When you realize life is finite and you are decaying, then that is the purpose of you living. You got to do good things and great things to have good feelings and feel accomplished.

Socializing outside in the world just by shopping at supermarkets lets you see the world. I am old now with a couple of papers and some accomplishments and work experience. By venturing out to “old people” bracket, the world is different from young adults. At this age bracket it is growing, learning, developing and exploring. Thinking at the higher levels. What to create? What to develop? What to learn? How to learn? What drives you more? What excites you? What do you need to learn? What makes you healthy? What makes you feel good?

You get most of the answers working alone in your room working really hard and focused on your craft.

After working, I realized I needed to take the time to learn and grow more at my own leisurely pace. I know what I can do for work now in computers. The work needed to program at the highest levels requires more learning and tons of discipline. Keeping focused and pushing doing projects and general learning. I need to take the time to learn at my pleasure now.

Anyhow, I am in no rush. You can not really push now for me. I need to enjoy the time learning about things now. I pushed hard before but that is not natural and not right. You don’t get that natural structure of efficiency and solid foundation if you push all the time. You just have to cruise slowly now to let things trickle in.

Whatever happens will go. You will eventually get there as everyone else does as they get old.

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/8899313-i-love-people-as-i-meet-them-one-by-one

“I love people as I meet them one by one. People are just wonderful as individuals. You see the whole universe in their eyes if you look carefully. But as soon as they begin to group, as soon as they begin to clot, when there are five of them or ten or even groups of smallest two, they begin to change, they sacrifice the beauty of the individual for the sake of the group.”
― George Carlin

That is why it is best to look at people one-on-one and not in their groups.

I focused growing and getting to the person I wanted to become in life. Working alone and individualistically, I disregard grouping most of the time. But in society out in public it is all about race sometimes. I avoid that by working in my team where we are all on the same frequency and staying home learning on my Internet computer chatting with friends over messengers.

Things that I accomplished and the aftermath:

• I got my papers but then realized there is so much more to learn in computers. You have to understand basics of bits and bytes and more (math, physics, logic). To learn but slowly is to get all the degrees in in-person schools. But you must be passionate about it really to get something. You got to zone out and disregard the naysayers and negative thinking from life and society. You really got to avoid general thinking about people, culture and race to think beyond and over it. Avoid people who are stuck in their ways and avoid people who think cultured so much. Thinking cultured so much is backwards for the most part. You got to think so old and past all this or otherwise you think negative and down and get no where. You can not let race and culture limit you. You got to think your way to grow and rise above the general thinking.
• I thought if I got my papers and did some personal projects I could land a programming job. But no one really helps. There aren’t specific entry-level work out there. You got to have the knowledge and develop the platform like Wix, Square Space, WordPress inside and out. You got to know every piece of code behind them to become a web developer in today’s society. Everyone expects that and more and then 10x more. I don’t really like web development. But it is not bad because I like how useful it all is.
• I became the hobbyist in computers. When I was in grade 7, I wanted to program, program. But that goal was too big at older age and too hard in reality from the kid and normal perspective. When programming, you need to develop efficient and modular with the best structure. I lazily built things but I guess that is a start to grow and to continue to build more efficient and better things??? Anyways, now I became the hobbyist and more. I grew more after a year from finishing school and really can take the time to program things with bigger and broader grasp, focus and control. The more broader and bigger you get the better you feel as that is actual growth and maturity and larger scope.
• It is great learning and growing, I am getting to think different, bigger and socialize better with more people instead of thinking like a young adult 20 years ago. New feelings and new avenues to go about.
• Working for days, 3-4 days at a time, on my projects makes me feel so grown up and alive and allows me to have the new knowledge to do new bigger mature things. Just working on web development for others did not give me anything really “new”. All I am doing in web development right now is learning stable well made web development platforms that have been standardized for the last 5 to 20 years.

So right now, all I can do is my projects because I need 20 years of experience to do WordPress right. WordPress came out in 2004. I got to learn all of that and 10x more to develop to customize for clients. I am not going to push, push, push. I guess I am resting on the idea of learning more and doing more school and developing my projects until I have accumulated the knowledge to do WordPress good. Will this route be enough? At least I have a passion so I can teach it. I can teach general programming now.

Is there entry-level work? Not really …

I learned now at my age now that life is all about work that you like and creates anew. That will give you everything there is in life. It will give you good thinking, new thinking, confidence and health.

I also learned this from growing old now:

Don’t let anyone stop you from thinking, good and new for yourself. Those people are just immature and racist people. I am old now and can not deal with that nonsense. You aren’t suppose to think with “the people” at old age. You are suppose think above.

You got to change the way you think. This is true at older age. This enables you to grow and be present and think positive and nice and helpful. It enables you to work and do things new and different and civil. This is done through work. Can try to work together.

At older age (when you are mature) it is all about thinking anew. That is all you can ask for when you finally old and at rest.

As a man, it is about “building”. That is all a man needs.

Also being Vietnamese at the core there is going to be adjustments to flourish and have a life here in the West. Like every other immigrant to the Western shores in the past, there is a period of resistance. Things are new and different for everyone involved. Then after awhile there is acceptance??? But again just do your thing and focus on the broader picture.

When there is trouble, ask what do you want to develop? What do you want to do? What is the idea or project that interests you?