‘War’ in general

My mother and father could not learn because of the Vietnam War. That war spanned Nov 1, 1955 – Apr 30, 1975. My parents were born in the early 1950’s.

They were unable to follow their passions and could not learn fully the English language because of the war. This is horrible when we are all living in the English western world of influence.

They fled to a first world country, Canada, as Boat People refugees back in 1979.

The Vietnam War had the following impacts I feel:

• Both of my parents did not finish Western post-secondary school and started a family right away working any job that was available to them. Without a degree they could not have the power and freedom of someone with higher education. This is horrible when living In Canada where education is paramount. You should get an education first and spend every nickel and penny to get that education first and also experiences to help you and make supportive friends along the way. Without the full understanding of higher education, people may only focus on getting jobs and careers that are only about money and never explore the vastness of education in a first world country. Education first then money? Or money first? There are loans you can get for education here in Canada. Education and experiences should be first.
• Even after retiring, my parents became too old to learn more and it was hard to learn with their Vietnamese mindset. My mother still has a hard time with English and my father still is in university trying to finish his bachelors. When I talk to them, they don’t really see “what I am doing and what I have accomplished” I think. For example, people growing up in Asia do not fully grasp the English language as most sentences in Asian languages might have only one meaning rather than 2 or more in English. They might struggle to understand what a native born Canadian English speaker has to say at first. They can not sit in a classroom and do 7 courses a semester because they are older so tired and maybe a bit bleak and gloomy. My parents are not open minded as me. Completing a degree made me open minded to anything happening and they did not finish school. My job is to help them finish school so they accept everything as acceptable.
• For me growing up, I had parents who did not have full knowledge of Vietnam culture and history to teach me as they left Vietnam alone young. My parents lived isolated from the Vietnamese community and tried to be independent as much as they could. I had no immediate cousins/aunt/uncle or grandparents in Canada to raise me. I did not understand my culture growing up and was not proud of it because the “bad” Vietnamese stereotypes in media perpetuated and focused on. These bad stereotypes about Vietnamese were believed by other people too. It was horrible times to live in back in the 1980’s, 1990’s and 2000’s.

I am doing finally OK now. The way I overcame all this was to put myself in the field that I liked and met wonderful friends who are more optimistic and positive than me to collaborate with. Now I am a tutor in computers and doing other things that I like.

If you are having a difficult time in life, it could be your environment. Please try to get away from the negative environment. Put yourself out there and the people you need will find you in-person or even online the Internet. These optimistic positive people are out there that vibe with your positive side and bring out only positivity in you. Show yourself and they will find you! You must find and work with these optimistic and positive nice people all day! Working with these people involves your entire being!

Avoid people who think negative or one-way only. You must keep an open mind for positivity. If you encounter anyone thinking negative or one-sided avoid them at all costs! Do not mingle with less positive and less optimistic people! There is absolutely no room in your life for any negativity. It is your life and it should be positive always!

To avoid negative thinking, I sit alone on my computer in my room with door closed doing what I like talking to like minded individuals all day.

I also try to train my mind to think more. I think about building things to avoid thinking all spaced out and avoid spreading myself so thin. I do not accept the destructive chaos of everyday life and do not accept growing old.

War in Vietnamese History

Personally what I know about Vietnam is very minimal. I am trying to learn more about Vietnamese history and culture but I feel it is too foreign to me to understand. I don’t feel like learning it because I have such a westernized lifestyle and any different cultural learning is just different and too much to accept and grasp.

I am talking to Vietnamese-Canadians (Vietnamese born in Canada/USA) to educate me about Vietnamese things as I have a Vietnamese-Canadian view of the world. Learning about other cultures might improve my understanding and broaden my view but it is a lot of work.

But all I know and feel is that Vietnam has been in constant wars.

It pains me and hurts me that all I feel and know that Vietnam was just warring all the time???

That is why I am upset when racism and culturalism is put in play in the workforce and socialization.

In the back of my mind and possibly in my genes and the way I think is just constant fight and fleeing for survival and acknowledgment sometimes because of “war”? I must learn more about my history and culture to not think and behave this way.

Only when I am with my friends who are positive and focus on ideas and projects I feel comfortable into doing things other than talk about culture and history.

When people ask about my background and start making judgement based on it, it is so bad.

I met a lot of people in my life who just judged and left me based on my background alone.

Life is not fair I guess …

Understanding

I am the first generation born in Canada to Boat People refugees from the Vietnam War.

I have my reasons for doing the things I am doing.

I don’t think I have to explain myself.

Once I was done school

After I finished school and had the time to reflect, I realized how lucky I am being able to compute.

My parents don’t understand how important computing means.

Canada has all the technology available to them and being a neighbor to USA they share education and resources.

My parents do not understand programming or computers. Being able to be so logical and under control with a background in programming has made me healthy, patient and be able to process everything better with calmness.

My parents lack control sometimes and are very emotional.

Wars in general set countries back. I heard Vietnam before the war was pretty developed.

Economic development and technology development stops for the people residing in conflict.