Updates (February 7, 2024)

Teaching: Teach and do your own thing – I still got to do my own thing what makes me and teach my way currently. My perspectives and my current and evolving understanding of people and schooling should be OK. Teaching in the West should be interesting. I am not sure if themes and polarized themes will be important in teaching. I will just wing it. I will be open minded. It will be still a push to do this. Anyways you got to push and think in order to live in the West. I am finally accepting it now to push.

Life: You are supposed to be technical – It is nice and good to be so social and jolly understanding different cultures and perspectives. But you really have to be technical too. Well to prove yourself in society is to be highly technical especially at old age. People are amazed and taken back when you are so technical. Your personality and culture can be so technical too. At my age and with my experiences, you can go beyond the superficial and beyond 1-3 layers deep. It can be beyond someone’s current personality too. It can be more heavy technical than emotional. How far technical and out there can you go? Beyond the everyday? Also beyond the general judgmental and gazes?

Life: You should just focus on one thing at a time – Let’s see how to do things one thing at a time. Do things one thing at a time things I like to get full understanding and enjoyment without the emotional stress of learning things that are too technical in nature.

Life: Young immature people – You have to show 2 sides to the story to young immature people. Let them act and behave the way they want to do and show them the alternative perspective if they want to hear it. That is all there is to life. I do have an alternative perspective I think.

Life: My alternative perspective – Canada is good and all with all the peoples of the world here. But at old age, you must become independent. My alternative perspective is to think beyond the general judgmental 1-layer gazes. I am trying to make money now and trying to teach people my way of work in creating new types of tools and solutions. I build teaching mod tools for the most part because that reflects me. I am not sure how general I can become but that is my perspective. I don’t think I can be that spaced out. Not sure if going to change to other different perspectives and angles will help me. It will tire out me for sure. I will listen and give an ear but I got to do what I think will make me happy and pursue the perspective that will push me forward doing things and will possibly give me a perspective and possibly a vantage point which is excellent and important to have. I think there are old people like me who think like me. My perspective is very liberal and pretty helpful and gives people opportunities to share and grow without being controlling and without taking sides. I did meet people like me. I should avoid people who only want their perspective to be the only one that only benefits themselves and their “ego”.

Life: Socializing – I am finally learning about socializing and working with people after 20 years in school. Hmmmm .. I am trying to find people on my wavelength. But I think I should also be considering people who have a alternate compatible wavelengths. The people on my same frequency should be able to do something I guess? Or do people on my wavelength float? Should people on my wavelength do something? Getting old sucks and floating while old sucks. You got to do something new and for yourself to have pride and to feel good. Am I asking too much? Is it really social? Do you have to be so social? Or when you get old you want to do stuff for yourself and create something new and unique ignoring the all social, social parts really? Do you really go out there and work socializing and collaborating in person? Do you do this at 40 years old? Do you do this after 20 years of school? Or do you study more maths and become a thinker and doer? And you just do this thinking alone with your friends? Have you learned enough about the “social” world at 40 years old? Or do you just work with Ben Cybulski and Dmitry Nefedov for life? Do too many cooks really spoil the broth? Or do you work and play with people who are already established in the general working system? Do you really want to work in the general system? Creating the tools and utilities was the most exciting thing that I have ever done so far though. Does that mean just creating products the only thing what was worthwhile for me? Creating tools was the only thing that I ever wanted in grade 6. Is there anything else I want to learn? System designs and communication systems? I think those are good things to learn. Should I attempt to learn a real computer science degree and even mathematics? Or should I just learn what I like after doing school for 20 years? So many questions. So many ways to grow. I am only driven now by the things I like now. Should I push to study things I don’t like? Will that open my horizons and give me grit and resilience? Or keep doing what I love and somehow I will eventually learn “all things”? Is forcing yourself to learn things you don’t want but need actually needed? Or can you just ‘zone out’ doing stuff that you like? I am pretty sure I should just go for the most value thing and help myself doing the things that give me good feelings and attainment. That is to do the things I like ‘zoned out’ and with my current friends who are so liberal without the drama or bias. No themes and no control. I am old now and tired of floating and being always “the helper”. I should just fill my belly and do spout of what I know doing what I am doing to help my niche and those who are willing to listen and learn from me. As a Vietnamese person, it is so important for me to concentrate on myself to avoid the general stereotyping I find in the young public eyes. But really I can just hang out with my friends all day doing what I love and that will eventually fix itself as people overall become old and become more educated in general. At least I am voicing my concerns here in seeing what I experienced out there. If I become so specialized in my field, I think that is enough.