Updates (January 11, 2024)

Culture: My perspective – I am understanding that my experience and voice can muster something different and unique in this world. Life is not about following or listening to others or old traditions and customs. It is not about listening to old hierarchal systems in place. I don’t listen to anyone really. I just observe and move on. Why should I as I live in Canada? Everyone is free to do whatever they want really here. I just work with my group and things get done in “our world”. I am so old now that I must live for myself now and enjoy what time I have left on this planet as I am so old now. I listened enough to people and it got me no where. I had enough of circling around and must grow and move on. The rest of life is exploring and learning and having fun.

Culture: Vietnam – When I went to Vietnam the few times after finishing university, I saw shops and shop and repair centers all around mostly. Everyone was trying to get by and working the extra 20-50% more to make ends meet and have some left over. After visiting a few times, I realized that I should be putting the extra work but do it my way. As a Canadian born Vietnamese man, I always had the feeling that I must put in the work on my passions to have anything good and valued and unique and different. I knew if I was going to get a professional degree or professional job I would not perform well internally and externally because I wasn’t “living everything through and through”. I think when you are born here in Canada with all it great experiences and education you should just pursue your passions to the furthest extent possible to see where it goes. It is a wonderful feeling doing what I love day-in and day-out. I hear people just work do build character and resilience to have that outer shell and working man tag but I am 40 years old this year. I am pretty sure continuing on my journey doing what I love will get me the education, skills and enjoyment.

Programming: Hardware versus Software – The software and the hardware debate. Which do you choose?

Programming: Old age – I thought life was fun outside but at but at 39 years old and 20+ jobs now, I think the rest of life is programming and hopefully being creative. Making software for the masses. Out around and down. Think broader in creating tools and solutions for all. Thinking and an outpost.

Programming: Creativity and Programming – People can talk about health and life but what else? In my early years, I just thought about normal everyday things. But at my age now, it is all about creativity and programming and combining them I guess. It took me decades to think this way.

Culture: What do I want to do as a Vietnamese in North America – I grew up watching YouTube. I watched all these successful Vietnamese YouTubers showcasing their talents: LeendaDProductions, richiele, Andy Le from MartialClub and nathandoancomedy. I am older than all these people. I guess at my old age now, I must do something that is mature …

Health: My family doesn’t think abstractly – My health improved so much when I finally finished my diploma. Finishing a diploma in computer programming was my ticket. It shows everyone I have some social value which people must see. I am trying to show my family how important it is to think abstractly and high all day to improve all aspects of your life thinking broadly and above and be controlled of your emotions by doing programming. That is the mature solid gift programming gives. It allows you to think logically several layers high (5 more) than a normal person who is consumed by emotion and influenced by society. You are no longer controlled by people as you do more and more programming and socialize and network in the world. You keep growing abstractly, structured and self-controlled, observing people logically and more logically keeping you above your emotions and feelings which can hurt or cause you to suffer unnecessarily. You don’t need to hear and get affected by people’s projections of what you should act like.

Life: Why I limit my social media – It is a part of growing up. You don’t need to focus on others and not focus on superficial things as you are old now and possibly smarter now and growing up to think abstractly and above. No pictures and no real personal social media posts. You need to grow into the next dimension to feel good.

Programming: Can you really get used to programming – I think you can never get used to programming all the time (for me at least). Thinking abstractly and that it feels good living up there thinking so abstractly and structured from above. Therefore, it can be an escape from the everyday to think healthy from the everyday norm. That is the whole point. You think abstractly to avoid the suffering of the everyday norm. Doesn’t everyone need this? Would it help people who currently suffer to think this way? Steve Jobs said that everyone should program. But I think everyone should for health reasons to escape from their harsh version of their reality.

Programming: Independent projects – As an older man who is Vietnamese, I have been put in so many positions where “other people” just project their power and feelings about how I should act, behave and what I should do for the rest of my life based on me being “Vietnamese alone”. It is mainly just all bad stereotypes they harbor in their core about Vietnamese they grew up with learning 😊. Well I do independent projects because I can not bother with “other people”. It is the free world for everyone especially in Canada. Everyone can live and work with their friends, family and groups without having outside people negatively bothering them. It is mainly older people and people around my age who have this to keep their ego/power in check. I guess I will continue to work with my friends and make my own space. This is kind of expected and natural and normal for this to occur. Don’t expect anything else. Don’t expect anything at all. I will work my way around. Life is sometimes pretty biased and political. How am I going to do things in my favor? How will I change things?

Life: All good things and hard things are the same – That is all there is to life. All good things and all hard things are the same things you should attempt to do. Nothing is easy. Life is not easy. Good and hard go together and must be pursued. We live in a society now where easy things are chosen. That is wrong. To live a good life, you choose the “hard life” and hopefully it is somehow likeable/bearable maybe so you don’t get chronically ill.

Work: Contribution – Though I like programming somewhat (40% of the time), liking it helps me attain the skills and hopefully do more and do more hard things … After doing enough programming for me I felt and then doing more programming, I can look at more things objectively, structured, higher levels to a point where learning more and learning more hard things enables me to be in more control, control my space, change things in my favor to create space for myself and spaces for the people I care about. At the end, I guess I would like a say in things. Have my say in this world and contribute. I think that is what I am lacking at the end: having my say and to contribute. Can you be knowledgeable enough with a lot of experiences to have social presence and have an opinion that people can learn from and relate to? Are we all just “young” and “struggling” to get by? Are we adding any new feelings, thoughts and experiences? A life of “hard work” and “struggle” can possibly create something new.

Programming: Cyclic nature of programming – Programming makes me behave this way. When doing computer programming, the imposter syndrome is always high. Therefore I am always thinking and searching for more meaning and never stopping and always asking more questions. For me as an average person struggling with programming, this might be great to always think and always improve and always be positive. Thinking higher and more abstractly takes you away from the everyday. The everyday can be depressive and suffering. Programming is a cyclic battle for me. Always feeling worthless and always trying to improve bit-by-bit. That is the whole point of this blog. There is no guaranteed solutions or feelings of attainment for long periods. This field is different from other fields. Other fields there are people who judge things and others 100% black or white. Not here. You can not just exercise, take a pill or a vacation really. That is good and needed but there is more. You got to float.

Life: In public – Trying to do things as a programmer, I am always thinking in the clouds. When I venture out in the world shopping and eating now, only people who are also in the clouds I can relate too. The fluid nature of programming makes you open minded that you don’t judge people really. The people that judge you are not fluid and not in the clouds. When you show them through your energy and aura that you are open minded and have broad thinking and skills, then they stop and rescind because they judged you wrongly. It is great! Show people that they should be open minded and should grow instead of being so closed off. They could be suffering way too much …